Today I got to thinking about how I spend my time. And once again, I realize that I spend way too much time online. My sons are growing older and often not home during the summer days. They are hanging out with friends or my oldest is working. I can't believe I don't have them underfoot all the time anymore. There is lots of "downtime" for this mom of three teenage boys. Spending lots of time with my nearly 4 year old granddaughter this week and my 5 year old nephew and 3.5 year old niece has made me miss when my boys were little.
I took my granddaughter to preschool storytime at the library today. I admit to feeling very strange at the library. I was surrounded by young mothers with toddlers and babies in their arms. It seemed so long ago that I was that mother holding the child. Now when I hug my sons, I can rest my chin on their shoulders. I can't even kiss the tops of their heads anymore unless they are sitting down somewhere. It all goes so fast.
All of this reflecting made me realize how short life is. Truly, one day you are holding a newborn son in your arms and time flies so quickly. Tomorrow we'll go over college loan papers. And we really never know how much time we each have on this earth, do we? Not to be morbid or anything, but we cannot assume that we can say and do the "important things" tomorrow. For some people, tomorrow will not come.
So even though I have more "me time" now that my boys are older, I realize I don't want to spend it online for hours each day. I want to find a balance. I want to find a way to connect with my sons more during their teenage years. I want to be sure that they will come home to visit when they move out of the house. I want to teach them to be men who want to make the world a better place. I want to write down my memories of my childhood. I want to write down the things about my mother that I don't want to forget. And the same for my father.
Sometimes I think technology is a curse. When I was young, we either played outside during the summer or did other things with our family. TV viewing was limited and I remember playing a lot of cards with my mother and sister. I read a lot in the summer. I'm just as guilty as my sons for being online too much.
I don't want to regret the choices I have made for my time. I want to be mindful of each day. I want to be more grateful for all that I have in this life. I need to focus more on these things and less on other things.
Life is short. The days go so quickly. I want to make the memories now that will comfort me should God bless me with old age. I want to be a better "me". Because you only go around once and...life is short.
1 comment:
Yes, time passes quickly, and seems to accelerate as the kids get older! Now that you have some time this summer, you should do the thinks you mentioned---like writing down memories of your parents and of your childhood.
One thing---I would bet good money your sons will come to visit you when they move out! They love you, and you have done a great job raising them.
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